Notepad – Home

There had come a point in my life where I wasn’t sure what I think and talk. From that day I left myself no choice but to find me. I had no one to talk to. I had no one to share my daily thoughts with. So I tried to find my own self that was lost many years ago. I think I had not found it hitherto. I never thought about myself. I never asked myself what I wanted. I never asked my mind what it really had in it. I never asked my heart what are its desires. I never asked my body who looked after it when I was focused on people around me rather than it. I never asked my inside what I really wanted from life. I never knew there will come a point where my living will feel like pointless, my soul will feel like heavy, my heart will feel like sinking, my mind will feel like numb. Have I reached this point too late? Or too early? It’s a point where I don’t blame anyone for anything. Because it was meant to dawn upon me whatever has come to me. God thought I am ready for this so here I am . Sitting while writing this on my notepad in my phone. This is where I have started to share my inner self. This is where I think my being belongs. This notepad is the ‘my person’ who’s not gonna judge my thoughts and is not gonna say anything in return. It’s just gonna listen to me like a friend listens to you when you’re in distress. It’s been a few months but I feel like this notepad has become my home. The home apart from my home where only I live and rest. I pour my heart out here. I feel so blessed to have something in my life which soothes my pain. The pain I am not sure where is coming from. While writing this I am feeling the true meaning of ‘being home’. No matter how many phones I change, notepad is still gonna be my home.


12:10 am

-M

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